Friday, September 25, 2009

Poll: The most empowering video is:

Please watch these Public Service Announcement Contest entries and vote for your favorite one! Do it for me! One of these will make it to communicate to the world about the importance of Breast Cancer Awareness and Research for a Cure.

Poll: The most empowering video is:

Wednesday, September 16, 2009

Meant to smile

To decide the next moment is yet the challenge ahead...even with what is left, I will still be me...just transformed. This transformation is out of my control, it is not something I chose, I do not want it, but I am forced through time. I am bounding through a vortex of surrealness that flairs in the mirror when I take a moment to look. I am who I am by only those that really know me, and only they understand it is impossible for me to remain the same without movement. As I move through this life and what it brings, I have become who I am. Not everything that makes me is quiet or beautiful. Some of the things that are ugliest are someone else's perception of goodness. Insincerity and sanctimonious gestures have found their way in to many parts of my journey, even before this current journey of illness. They do not trick me or harm me. For those that really know me, know a strong, determined lioness. It is not the tragedies in my life that have made me strong, but rather the behaviors and attitudes of my audience have made me want to be a survivor when I could have been a victim. Being a victim of my thoughts or circumstances requires me to allow others' judgements to control my choices. I smile each day, even when I need to cry. I cry when I need to feel the other side, so I may return to strength. In my youth I used to worry that others would not or could not understand me, therefore I would never really be known or accepted. Now I understand I need not explain who I am. I am loved by those who love me. I am understood by those who choose to accept me. I am free to be misunderstood and unaccepted. I am born to fight. I am meant to smile and my smile hides nothing, but shows the real me. To see my smile is to see the depth of my soul. If you feel my smile, you have taken a step in coming to know me.

Friday, September 11, 2009

Hospital time...again.

Sitting here at the hospital again getting fluids and pain medication. I'm here 2 to 3 times a week for something and have come to know much of the staff! They're all great here and take good care of everyone. Good joking around too keeps things on the positive. I come rolling in saying I'm here for my cocktail hour...or two!

I'm closing in on my last treatments before my surgery in November. It's always good to look forward rather than behind and know I have fewer to go.

Friday, September 4, 2009

Forgiveness

Forgiveness is not something you do solely for the person who hurt you—it is something you must do for yourself. Holding grievances against others invokes a chain reaction of negative feelings on the neurological level, creating a cycle of harmful energy.

By opening the heart and allowing grudges and anger to move through this boundless space, powerful healing can occur through meditation and prayer. Although it is not easy to move immediately or seamlessly from injury to pardon, practice and patience will lead you on the road to true forgiveness.

True, deep forgiveness accesses the recognition that all humans, however terrible or hurtful their actions, exist with basic goodness. This realization can transcend into an acknowledgement that we are all intertwined as part of a greater whole, and when we forgive someone else we are forgiving another part of ourselves.

What makes me whole and "healed" are these wisdom's of life. It is what I teach my sons and share with those who know me - it is my circle of life that defines me. I have broken down walls that were put up before me through keeping this wisdom. Behind those walls was fear. Fear keeps us from growing. Fear is negative energy. Forgiveness dissolves fear. It's never too late to grow! My love to all who have blessed my life!